A Problem Shared… Why Am I So Unlucky?


When Napoleon was asked if he preferred courageous generals or brilliant generals, he replied neither. He preferred lucky generals.

So how do you get lucky?

Our definition of the word ‘Luck’ is when preparedness meets opportunity.

If you are always prepared when an opportunity arises you will see it.

So how do you become prepared?

You can only ever see what is in your Model of the World so you continually need to push your boundaries in what you believe. Most modern-day inventions are made by people who continually push the boundaries in what is believable.

At one time the belief was that man would never be able to fly, just think where technology is now! So you need to be open to possibility, if you see something new, want to be a part of it.

We believe in everything and discount nothing; we are constantly searching for knowledge and new ways of doing things. You never know when that knowledge will be the preparedness to another opportunity.

Change the way that you think and behave. Cognitive flexibility can be cultivated and refined. To gain brain agility, think about different points of view on a single topic. Maybe you have a firm belief that you don’t like the dark winter nights. If that’s the case, look to come up with 10 advantages that come from us having dark winter nights.

Whether something is good luck or bad luck can be just the way that you think about it.

You can also learn to behave with more flexibility.

Flexible people often respond to the same stimuli differently than those who are set in their ways. They might take varied routes to work, or stop at out-of-the-way places for a cup of coffee, rather than heading to their favourite cafe for “the usual.”

Exploring new territory naturally increases the opportunity for good fortune.

Focus on what you want.

Set clear goals in all areas of your life yet make sure that they are not so inflexible that you miss other opportunities that arise as you are focussed on your goal.

The by-products that occur on the way to achieving our goals can often be more rewarding than the goal itself. For example, if your goal is to meet the love of your life and you go to a social event totally focussed on your goal. You may miss the opportunity of meeting other people who may become close friends or may be able to help you with your career.

Being relaxed and open to new things allows lucky people to see what is around them and then maximise the opportunity in what’s around them.

Rely on your intuition (inner-tuition).

Lucky people will test out their gut feelings and may start to build an opportunity from a feeling. We all have inner learnings that are built up over the years and we are particularly good at reading patterns at an unconscious level.

Inner feelings need to be cross-checked with other information and then calculated risks taken. You always need to take action and to take calculated risks to be lucky.

Expect to be lucky, you get what you focus on and what you then project. Some people call this the law of attraction.

If you focus on it, believe you will get it, project that you will get it then you then get it!

In NLP we talk about ‘Perception is Projection’.

While this phrase sounds a little mysterious, it actually means that we are fully in charge of what we perceive from other people.

Simply put, when we recognize others as being bigheaded or narrow-minded or any other description, we actually recognize a part of ourselves, otherwise how would we be able to know what it was?

So, basically, what we see in others is really ourselves!

When we project onto others how we want them to act and once this projection or judgment comes to our conscious awareness, it is then our projection. So to a certain extent, others around us will act how we want them to act.

If you project on others that you are a lucky person the chances are that they will see you as a lucky person. If you project on others that you are an unlucky person then they will probably steer clear of you.

Once you have the lucky mindset, project it onto others and surround yourself with lucky people.

If you want to attract lucky people, also be prepared to give. You need to go the extra mile for others without worrying too much about keeping score.

In our experience the old saying “what goes around comes around” is definitely true in business and in life, and “it” comes around when you least expect it.

As Ernest Hemmingway said to his son “You make your own luck. Do you know what makes a good loser? Practice”

So if you are going to practice anything we suggest that you practice being lucky!

We teach many techniques and principles for mastering your mindset in our NLP+® Trainings

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